The marriage proposal

This is something that’s been bugging me since yesterday. I decided to write it down here just to somehow get it out of my head.

Yesterday, my boyfriend proposed to me again. We already have two kids and of course, a wedding should be on its way, right ? I mean, that’s expected to happen. But now, instead of being excited about it, I’m scared. I’m really really scared and I dont know the exact reason why. Even the thought of it makes me cry.

Oh god, is that even normal ? I’m crying over a marriage proposal, but I’m not crying for the good reason.

I don’t really know what to do. I tried to explain what i feel, it ended up him getting hurt. Now we decided not to talk about it for now.  I really don’t know what to do.

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4 thoughts on “The marriage proposal

  1. Julxrp says:

    What is it about marriage that makes you feel that way?
    Right now its not just about you. Its about your kids as well. Whatever decision you make will affect them too.

  2. Shayne says:

    I think, especially with young parents, it’s easy to jump the gun and think that marriage is necessary and the subsequent next step. But, do what you feel is right by your own convictions. If you think marriage will affect your parenting, it might be best to wait. If you think marriage will only make your relationship with your significant other and your children even better, then go for it if you’re ready. I have a four-year-old with my boyfriend and we were set to get married when our son was younger, too. However, as time went on we realized that it was best to line things up first before diving into another huge life decision. It’s been two years since we decided to postpone the engagement (and marriage) and life’s still going well and as planned. Always follow your heart. 🙂

    • itsallhers says:

      Thanks so much for understanding. Yeah, we’re young and I think we need to set everything up first being doing another big decision. We both came from not-so loving parents ( he’s from a broken family , I grew up watching my dad having affairs while my mom takes the burden of hiding it from us , making their marriage work and balancing all the household finances. Those two thing are the main reason why I’m afraid of marriage , I don’t wanna experience what my mom experienced) and we have our own issues when it comes to getting married (he’s afraid that he’ll end up alone too, like his dad). We’re almost ( yup, almost) done with getting over those issues and for now I think we need to focus on our kids first.

      I cleared that out with him recently and he’s okay with it. He said he’ll just surprise me then.

  3. Nortehanon says:

    Well, perhaps this isn’t the perfect time yet for that, hence your feeling. The important thing is that you are both still there for each other. Just keep the fire burning and soon enough you’ll be surprised you’d be so much ready for it.

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