Since the first day of this year, I’ve been trying to get all the inspiration I need to keep me writing but there’s one problem during New Year’s Eve. As the year changed, a lot of realization kept coming in and it filled me with a lot of insecurities and negative thoughts.
How did we spend our New Year’s Eve by the way? Well, I was in Makati from December 30 ’til lunch of December 31. I bought some fruits and Tikoy for our family. I spent some time with Ryu first before preparing for Manila. My family is insisting that I should spend New Year with them since I already had Christmas with Michael. I said I can’t because we already had some arrangements in Manila for New Year.
I did the things I had to do then went to Manila right after that. I needed to drop by at Robinson’s Manila to by Sake (for the New Year festivities) and rose oil (for the shop). I tried to look for a red crop top too (for New Year, they said it’s for prosperity) but most of the things that I can find everywhere is too … well, technically they are smaller, they don’t fit me (what should I expect?! I’m on the sixth month of my pregnancy and I’m two sizes higher now, wth). I don’t have much choice so I settled with the only maternity dress I had that time. Haha!
Around 8 in the evening, we closed the shop and we went straight to their house – it took us roughly 1 hour to get there. We stopped at a 7-Eleven store first to eat something, and we also bought some custard beside St. Anthony Church (’cause I’ve been craving for that sweet treat for weeks before that).
We arrived in their house and he went to his grandma’s room right away and his son, Airu, immediately came out of the room to welcome us too. Seeing his father sitting at his grandma’s bed is not a good thing though. He hates seeing him. Michael went to lie down on the bed with his son and grandma, I immediately ate the custard that we bought (’cause I can’t wait ’til 12 midnight for those). We stayed there for about two hours only, he’s a kinda irritated with his father.
We headed to Charmain Angelito Sarmiento’s house first, saying that he failed to visit him on his birthday and he wanna say “Hi” to them too. He’s the baranggay chairman of Manila’s Baranggay 751 and he is the father of Joana, one of Michael’s closest childhood friends. He’s even like a father to him, he stayed with the Sarmientos during his pre-teen to his teenage years. Well, Chairman welcomed us and offered us drinks. They did a little catching up and that’s how he found out that Joana’s in Bulacan now. Chairman then invited us to spend the New Year in their home, in which Michael agreed. It’s just around half past ten that evening so, we decided to drop by at Onyong’s place first.
Onyong is one of Michael’s drinking buddies. Yep, drinking buddies (only?) and I rarely heard them talking about serious things. They are just together whenever they have drinking sessions, you know? Originally, Abby, Onyong’s fiance, invited us to come over for New Year that’s why we decided to go to San Andres in the first place . Technically, they will just drink ’til the sun comes out. When we arrived there, they’re already drinking. It’s the fourth time that I’ve been with them and yet Onyong can’t remember me. They keep on asking who I am, to which Michael kept on answering “She’s my wife” , then they’ll say “Ahh, your girlfriend?” Michael, on the other hand, will answer in a more serious tone, sometimes he makes it louder too, saying that I am his wife. To me it’s a little annoying. They cannot remember me because the one that they remember is his old live in partner. Another thing is, Onyong can remember Arnold, who he met only once (during their last drinking session) and he cannot remember me. When Onyong started smoking weed, Michael got a little angry. Onyong was sitting right next to me and he doesn’t care that I’m pregnant. Abby offered me some palabok and soda (since I obviously cannot drink because I’m pregnant) and few minutes after I finished the food, he said his goodbye and we head back to Chairman’s house. He assured them that he’ll come back after midnight (so that they will let him go). While walking, he said he doesn’t like what Onyong did.
Midnight struck and there are a lot of fire crackers in front of Chairman’s house. There are a lot of foods too but the house itself is technically quiet. Chairman welcomed us again, his wife hugged us while greeting us Happy New Year. Chairman offered us food, he even placed the first serving for us (since we’re too shy to get some). There is a certain feeling like something huge is missing in their house. Well, Joana is not there – and the whole time that we’re there, Michael keeps on saying “Sayang wala si Joana”. Taptap, Joana’s younger sister, joined us that night too and she and Michael seems to have these things that only the two of them know. It made me feel clueless and out of place for some reason. They kept on talking about things that I don’t know anything about. Well, instead of sulking around and ruining our first New Year’s Eve together, I decided to focus on other thing like the sweet Cassava cake that they have (I really have a thing for super duper sweet stuff lately) or the fire crackers outside the house.
A lot of things kept on entering my head that night too – both good and bad. Most of those thing that I wanted to write something about during that time – but I cannot remember them now. Such a shame. Lesson learned.
My mind was “floating” that whole night because my thoughts are with our son. I kept on thinking about him. Is he awake right now? Is he scared of the fire crackers? How is he?
Well, around 2:45am, we decided to go back to the shop where we’re staying. We dropped by at his grandma’s house again to take our bags. I thought I can eat some tikoy but unfortunately they did not cook the one that I bought for them. Michael was in a hurry too so I wasn’t able to get my custard. Me and Arnold are too sleepy and he needed to get some rest too.
I was craving for tikoy and custard that I even dreamed of it that night and it was also my first thought right after I woke up on the first day of 2014.
I want tikoy and leche flan.